This ain't my story.

I'm Clarence, I left part of my life 

and 

I couldn't find it.

It's raining outside when I'm about to type again tonight.

I hope things really change.

           I don't even know how to describe myself.Now.feels like some things are different inside. Maybe people start to ask,"what's so wrong?" I don't know.Help me find it.

          When this eyes meet that eyes now, things have changed. They never be the same anymore. Part of me doesn't like it, another quarter's searching for the things that gone wrong, and another one wants more. Sometimes I think.... maybe i'm too selfish as a person. I'm trying not to think about things,but still, they come to me. I hate to be a person like me right now. I'm a hateful person to be honest and I don't like it. ='(

I'm not trying hard enough,am I? Nobody really care though. Looks like you are struggling alone to fix things but I'm not... 

           Do you know how does it feel to have ones that knows you without having to say a word ? Like he/she can 80-90% answer things that comes out from your heart,not your mouth. I lose one. I don't know why I am thinking this way,but I think I lose one when all I have is one. O,o How 'bout you? Do you have any?

           I never know things will really affects me like this. That's why I tend to keep doing things like what I did before this and stay like that,because I know,things like this will appear once I step ahead.

           OmG,I don't understand why I'm typing these stupid lines.==" 

I don't know how to end it. Must it be this painful? zzzzz. *i don't have a right vocabulary to describe the word so I use painful.*

          Must I be this kind of human with this selfish thing in my body. Jesus! I've struggled once enough,and I hate to have this one again. 

Maybe I'm right, this life's not my story. 

I'm the second actress in a well written story book.