What should I say?

Maybe i've to stop talking.stop feeling.stop reminding.
Never ever judge just from what i say here,what i type here, what you listen from me. If you do then you don't know me. Don't think you will know me from this blog.
Stop that suprised sentences like "i thought you are that strong, i can't believe this,so you r fake for all this time?,blablabla" seriously,it sucks. Even Jesus the mightiest can shed tears,guys.
I never pretend to be strong,i just try to be one. You are the one who keep on telling yourself you have such cold-hearted friend like. It's not my fault to be whatever person i want to be, am i wrong?
stop that judgement about me as i'm a strong or wtf person i am for you. I never run over the hills and scream,"Hey,people! I'm a strong and fierce person! Come and prove it yourself!" i tell you,you won't succeed even if i scream that phrases out loud.
Is it wrong to be a fragile one? I'm a human,for whatever sake!
I never tell you to let me be your role model, if you decided to do it, then it's your consequences to be dissapointed. I don't know, don't you ever think about how i hate myself? I tell you people who can't stop judging this way,you'll hardly have friends or even just to be others friends, so don't come and sit down infront of me and ask, " Why is it this hard to have friends and a better life?" Go find your answer from yourself. You never know how hard to admit the way you hate yourself and then get up again, fall again, get up again, n end up falling again because of these kind of 'I-love-to-judge-you' mortals.

I see this kind of life really end.
If it can't recover and i'll let this one flow. I'm so done with such things.
You never know how it hurts to lose people you care,
How it hurts for you can't stop caring for people who ignore you,
How it hurts to be a person who is called as a stupid one,
How it hurts to be abandoned,
How it hurts to know that people actually not care about you, they just love to pretend,
How it hurts that you cry over things that should be done and gone for long time,
How it hurts to look at pther life,
How it hurts to be me.
So why?
Everytime i need myself to get up,you do this to me?
Infact i'm just that ugly person, am i this pity for you?
Don't tell me i don't learn, yes, i'm stubborn, but i learn.
If i ever know to know people is to be hurted this much, i don't thinki can say thanks to Him.
So, while you are busy on judging me, have you ever once think that i never regret on knowing you?
I know i'm imperfect, and i never beg you to appreciate me.

Last,I'm not judging here,just typing my words.
I'm hateable after all.